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Are you alright?
[ The journey home will take some time. She cannot tell if Edgard is miserable about this mission in particular, or if there some lingering despair hanging on him.
He seems sad. Maybe she cannot help him past it, or even change the reality of what they have just done, but she cannot pretend she is not aware of him in some way. ]
[ The journey home will take some time. She cannot tell if Edgard is miserable about this mission in particular, or if there some lingering despair hanging on him.
He seems sad. Maybe she cannot help him past it, or even change the reality of what they have just done, but she cannot pretend she is not aware of him in some way. ]
[Edgard is surprised at the question. He wasn’t under the impression that Derrica had noticed his existence at all. He’s hesitant. He knows his actions (and inactions) have been judged.]
I’m as alright as I usually am. Why?
I’m as alright as I usually am. Why?
You look like a used bandage.
Someone is looking for you.
Someone is looking for you.
Used are bad.
[With delight, though--]
New Edgard! What did you do? You will tell me.
[With delight, though--]
New Edgard! What did you do? You will tell me.
[The amount of things that weigh on Edgard could sink the ship they're traveling on.]
It didn't seem like anyone else thought too much about it. [Namely the woman speaking to him.] I try to, when I can. But, yes, of course, it weighs on me. Not much to be done about it though.
It didn't seem like anyone else thought too much about it. [Namely the woman speaking to him.] I try to, when I can. But, yes, of course, it weighs on me. Not much to be done about it though.
[She laughs. But that's not helpful, and Doki always wants to be helpful, obviously, so--]
You should apologize.
You should apologize.
They do think of it, in their way.
[ This is maybe very generous. Derrica has no idea whether Nell cares, or Darras, or Lazar. Poesia certainly doesn't, but that's an outlier. ]
It can be hard to get accustomed to. Some of us came from places where we'd already been used to making decisions like that, but...well, I just wanted to let you know it's alright, to hesitate.
[ This is maybe very generous. Derrica has no idea whether Nell cares, or Darras, or Lazar. Poesia certainly doesn't, but that's an outlier. ]
It can be hard to get accustomed to. Some of us came from places where we'd already been used to making decisions like that, but...well, I just wanted to let you know it's alright, to hesitate.
Yes, I am.
[preen preen preen. But also--]
You must apologize to him and then you must tell me how he takes it. Make sure that you do.
[preen preen preen. But also--]
You must apologize to him and then you must tell me how he takes it. Make sure that you do.
It's not easy to be...generous, in the moment.
[ And it's hard for Derrica to consider exactly what kind of impression he made, though she wants to assume the best of her fellow agents. ]
You shouldn't hold it against them. I'm sure no one thought anything other than you have a different line as to what should be done than they did. That's not weakness.
[ And it's hard for Derrica to consider exactly what kind of impression he made, though she wants to assume the best of her fellow agents. ]
You shouldn't hold it against them. I'm sure no one thought anything other than you have a different line as to what should be done than they did. That's not weakness.
So: could, but won't. That is very good for you, New Edgard.
Now you should tell him that you really mean it and you are very sorry and you believe him, that he could cave in your chest with one step, but you are apologizing so that he won't do that to you.
Now you should tell him that you really mean it and you are very sorry and you believe him, that he could cave in your chest with one step, but you are apologizing so that he won't do that to you.
It's good to worry. But you have to decide at some point whether or not you are devoted to this thing and prepared to live with it if you've chosen wrongly.
[ And it's still not a bad thing to worry, besides. Derrica does plenty of that. ]
I believe in what we've been trying to do. I don't think I'm wrong, but I think I'll be able to live with it if I am, or if we fail.
[ And it's still not a bad thing to worry, besides. Derrica does plenty of that. ]
I believe in what we've been trying to do. I don't think I'm wrong, but I think I'll be able to live with it if I am, or if we fail.
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